Messy us. 

Messy us. 

Why are the wounded so often shot? I am so sick of the people who masquerade as “holy”.  Pretending that they have it all together, that they’re NOT a mess, when they DEFINITELY are. 

Those that make themselves look better by bullying others. Pretending to be grown-ups, when actually they are juvenile, insecure children who are just too scared to admit that they are a mess too. 

It embarrasses me for them. 

It would be easy to be furious. To stoop to the same level of bigotry and hurt. And to be quite honest, it would feel good, too. In my flesh anyway. 

But I am called to something higher and greater: FORGIVENESS!

 

So here’s what I say to the wounded Believers Among us:

You are holy & dearly loved! 

You are precious is Abba’s sight, the Apple of His eye. 

You are a member of a mass of messed-up people with issues just like yours. Not worse than, but maybe equal to. 

We are all unique in our individual mess, and we are all in this together. Not a one of us will make it out of here alive, but we can help each other stay afloat if we try

So, whoever told you that you weren’t worth it–their time, their effort, their energy, or their love- they were/are just liars and bullies! 

You know how I know? Because, I BELIEVE THE KING, WHO SAYS THAT YOU ARE WORTH EVERY THING HE WENT THROUGH! and, baby that’s EVERYTHING! 

birth, life, torture, and death. All of it! 

If He is up against your personal bully, He’s the honest one! HE’S THE ONLY ONE who’s voice is worth listening to. He’s the only one who will ALWAYS be in your corner, cheering you on.


 
And to the “such were some of you”s, of whom I am the chief member:

In a world so full of crazy, it’s so hard to hold on to love. To look at it deep and desire for it to take root in your soul. 
So we retreat to our corners, tend our wounded, and love deep. 

But what about the ones outside our den of contentment? 

The easy is to be apathetic to anyone and EVERYONE else.

The simple is to let them take care of themselves, and say “they aren’t worth it.”

But is that Our call? 

Isn’t the call of EVERY believer to love as He loved?!

And here’s where I ask The questions: 

How do we love those who don’t want our love? 

How do we care for those who shove us away Everytime we open our arms? 

How do we continue to reach for those who may never trust us enough to accept the love we offer? 

I really have no clue! 

But maybe it’s written in the blood that still flows from Calvary. 

Maybe it’s in NOT SHOOTING THE WOUNDED among us!

Maybe it’s seeing ourselves in the injuries they wear, and loving like Our Lover does. 

Even if and when we do. Not. Know. How.

Maybe it’s doing it anyway. One moment at a time.  

I’m sorry for shooting first instead of loving. I hate that I see this ugly in me. That I let that same fear that gives the bully his power, overwhelm me. There is no excuse for it,only many MANY tear drenched apologies.  I am choosing to be a giver of love, tender of wounds, cry-with-me mama, forgiver of wrongs, wear-ER of thicker skin.   While I’m trying, will you?  Will you choose those same things in the moment, instead of after?  


Hold on Tightly

Hold on Tightly

Have you ever met someone, and instantly after you realize that you really want to get to know them? That they are the kind of people that you want to be around and to learn from? You want them in your life, to be a consistent part of it?  I have two such friends that are on my heart today.

I want to learn from them. I want to be better because of them.

Continue reading

my heart in my hands

my heart in my hands

In The Four Loves C.S. Lewis writes:

There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside of heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is hell.

closing yourself off is MUCH easier than loving people. Continue reading

To be fully known 

To be fully known 

we use too many words, don’t you think? 

Sometimes not even the ones we wanted to use when we started a conversation.

We use the ‘correct” ones. the meaningful. the kind. the gentle. and sometimes when we aren’t in the mood to edit them, we use the ugly. 

We use words we can think of on the spot. We use words that we have to meditate on for a bit.

We even use different ones depending on the audience or situation.

words chosen that will not offend. words they want to hear, instead of what they need to. words thought of and not. words that flow easily and ones that stick to the tongue. And if you’re like me, you even have ones that forget to show up when you need them. 

I’m thankful for God-given loved ones that I can just be with and not need THE RIGHT words. People that I dont have to think so hard in order to talk to. 

That’s one of the many things I love about THE FATHER, He never uses the wrong ones. 

 He doesn’t even needs our words to know our heart, we can just sit with Him because we don’t need to speak!

we can be quiet. Still. WORDLESS.

Abba never uses to many or to few.

He never fumbles over His tongue or gets flustered when the ones that escape are misunderstood. He says what He means to say the first time. AnD He never gets it wrong nor does He concern himself with our reaction. 

He never even gets tongue-tied! (I wonder what that’s like.)

Maybe the more I know Him, the more I love Him, the more I strive to emulate Him, these words that I stumble over will come easier?

Maybe I’ll know when to speak and when to listen.

Maybe I’ll have more of His words and less of mine. 

Maybe then when words don’t come i’ll be content in the quiet.

 i think there’s a bit of growth in a wordless quiet. a bit of time to heal without thought. a bit of rest.
maybe it’s a spacious place. maybe it’s a small cozy nook of happy.

i don’t know…but i think i’d like to visit and stay a while.
When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” 1 Corinthians 13:11-12



 I long for the day when “I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”