OLDER

“Older”…such a sad and wretched word when I was younger.
I watched a Movie tonight w/ a dear friend. I’d never heard of it but she suggested it, so we watched.
It was about one of my least favorite times of my life: high school.

I hated school…the social part, the dramatic that comes w/ life as a teen part.
I loathed it…and I don’t to EVER want to go to a reunion!

Looking back (w/ the eyes of a 31yr old mind you) I see a girl who wasn’t ugly.
Wasn’t a wreck.
Was quite lovable…if only she’d see herself as she really is.

But did I? did you? NO!
AND WHY? because it’s High School. It’s 4yrs of your life that were EVERYTHING at the time.

but now…___years later, what do you see?

I see her.
She was afraid and lonely. She wanted to be someone else…anyone else but her.

And the sad thing is…High School youth in 2011 still feel that way.
I love working with youth girls…but they don’t get it. They don’t get that it’s only 4 years. That life goes on.
That you won’t always be scraggly and awkward. That you won’t always have to deal with everyone else’s drama.
That one day, you’ll see yourself as who you really are…if You CHOOSE TO!
Yes, some of us have to recover from those years.
Yes, some of us take a loooong time to see ourselves the way He sees us…but some of us do.

STOP (i like it better when my time doesn’t work lol)

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Beauty



Mirror mirror on the wall….
i. used. to. HATE. YOU!
for so many years! just looking long enough to fix my hair and makeup. not wanting to see what it showed me in reflection.
time
changes
everything!
ya know, I’ve heard so many women say how that life was so different in their 30s. and NOW I SEE!
PERSPECTIVE.
This body…changed to beauty w/ the birth of each child.
This hair is changing color (to a much shinier shade) but I’m seeing it as beautiful.

I am not this body! I am not! I.AM.NOT!
I am purchased! Bought w/ a Price! Paid IN FULL!
and just like everything else, The ENEMY of my soul TURNS BEAUTIFUL INTO UGLY.
it’s all perspective…

Beauty is my children making me laugh so hard i cry.
Beauty is looking at their little faces, so much like their mothers.
Beauty is seeing how much beauty my husband sees when he gazes my way.
Beauty is the “home” I’ve found in his embrace.
Beauty is 20 young ladies in Sunday school, looking to this moron for inspiration.
Beauty is their faces, their lives…so ready to spread wings and fly.
Beauty is time.
Beauty is life lived to the fullest. REFUSING to NOT make a difference.
Beauty is my laugh lines deepening.
Beauty is NOT WHAT THE MIRROR SHOWS, It is how i see it.
How I perceive it. How I choose to see!
Beauty is loving the creation He has made! Lumps, Bumps, and all.
How can that which is made reject the forming? How can we look at HIM and tell HIM that His ART is not as beautiful as He sees it?

Beauty is seeing through eyes that are focused on the eternal perspective.

So I humbly stand before you, my mirror mirror on the wall…and smile into these blue eyes and say…”beauty is me. Beauty is who He has made me to be.”