5/17/15-6/15/15 “we are a vapor”

James says:

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.


we appear for a little time and “vanish away”, that’s how the NKJV reads.

modern medicine is such a catch 22! we take drugs to prolong a “vapor.” Chemo then radiation…then what?!  will it even matter in the end?

this is such a hard road…a CRAP filled road!

i told my girls today that Papa would not get better.

I never want to EVER lie to them-either by omission or blatant lies.

But listening to their gut wrenching cobs was devastating. I SO WISH I WAS WRONG…that cancer isn’t what it is.i want to shield them–hold them away from the pain that is lurking in the shadows. but i cannot. I know that ABBA will hold them together just like he is holding me.

i hate this…all of it! FOR US. for my friends who are hurting…for my Daddy. i hate it that so many of us know the craptastic pain that cancer brings.  I hate that my Dad cannot be on chemo forever…that we found it too late.

i hate that after so many years spent unhealthy in our relationship that i only get 4 SHORT YEARS with my Daddy.

I HATE THE enemy!!


Come, Lord Jesus! Rescue us from all of this pain, sorrow, wrong that is this planet and short pre-life. Come and bring us life! Sooner rather than later. I am so glad that this is just a drop in the bucket of FOREVER with Jesus! That this is a pre-life VAPOR! Will You help me to empathize with the hurting? To love people to You? Use this love, this pre-life…that it would be worth something…even when my Daddy’s finally more than a just vapor.





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