i havent been in this space for what feels like ages.
i’m not sure why, other than that who i was before, is now who i am now. but isn’t that true of all of us?
life happens, time passes, and we are different.
this part of my journey is new and looks so different from it what did before.
i read someplace that God allows us to go thru hard things so that we can learn things that we’d never learn any other way.
it feels weird that i am so different now. odd that my last year with my father changed so much of who i am in my core. what i believe now is different.
how i view life and living is different.
who i consider my true friends are is different.
how i relate on “normal” days to my children is different.
how i love my man is different.
how i view God had His people is different.
maybe i grew up a bit more while i was walking with my dad down the last bend on this earth. i think by helping him finish his journey well helped me to discover more of my own.
i told a friend the other day, “i’m not sure who the woman is who looks back at the mirror at me anymore….she’s lost her voice.”
and maybe she has. maybe i don’t know her because i’ve never been her before. but i think she’s braver, stronger, more no-nonsense and real. maybe i’ll grow to like her in time.